Money Musings 💭 that’s next year’s problem 🤪
In this email I share a lot about J and my personal dynamic around money. He tends to be the spender in the relationship (most couples have one!). And I tend to be the saver.
In my work with others, I find that’s pretty common. Eventually in a relationship, there’s a saver and a spender and we polarize one another over time. The saver gets more into saving as the spender gets more into spending.
As you can imagine, this can cause some stress. 😜
J and I also process our spending differently. I am pretty aware of the spending happening day to day so our credit card bills don’t surprise me. If we make some large purchases during the month, J doesn’t seem to notice them or stress until the credit card bill comes through. He looks at the large balance and inquiries - what happened this month?! 🤔
It’s important to recognize these habits because it can help us navigate our finances as a couple. I sometimes remind J that certain choices will add to a bigger credit card bill and it gives him better context for decision-making.
Even if you are running your finances solo, it’s helpful to know your own tendencies to set yourself up for success and less stress.
At a recent Money Party, 🥳 J and I were mapping our various sinking funds - E’s tuition, taxes and my maternity leave. I noticed we were prioritizing things that were happening sooner at the expense of planning for things that came later.
J said - “That's next year’s problem.”
We both started laughing. 😂 You have to appreciate the honesty. Despite the obvious flaws in his plan, so many of us deal with our finances this way. It’s really hard to prioritize things that are further in the future - especially when we’re just trying to figure out what’s going on right now.
But you can imagine that adopting this as your finance life motto will set you up for a lot of money stress.
So much of our money journey is about being honest with ourselves around money. Not just what’s happening with it, but how we are thinking about it and interacting with it. We spend a lot of our life pretending. Why? It’s fun to pretend. It’s fun to pretend that next year’s problems don’t exist or that they’ll get figured out with no stress.
Our actions today set us up (or don’t) for future months and years. Of course, it’s never too late to turn it around or get better, but the choices we make today have direct repercussions on our future financial well-being. 😌
Are there things you are making next year’s problem? Or the year after’s problem? Hit reply and let me know.
MONEY MOVE OF THE WEEK
Learn from one money misstep. Think about a recent money mistake (go with the one that pops into your head the fastest). 💡 Maybe you bought something you swore you wouldn’t. What usually happens? You proceed to chastise yourself - “you’re just hopelessly terrible with money.” Your goals (and hope of ever achieving them) go out the window (at least for a bit). And we do this to ourselves over and over again.
The truth is, each money misstep or mistake you make is a chance to learn and improve in your money life. Try (as best you can) to stay objective. What can you learn from it? How can you set yourself up for success next time?
In this example where you bought something you swore you wouldn’t - what happened? Was it a sale email that set you off? Or is going into your favorite store your kryptonite? Test out some strategies to see what works. Maybe you try unsubscribing from that store’s sales emails 💌 or choose to read a book 📖 outside ☀️ vs. online shop on your lunch break.
YOU GOTTA SEE THIS
Yesterday, August 18th, 100 years ago (in 1920) women won the right to vote. It’s sometimes hard to believe that even just 100 years ago we couldn’t vote. Even decades later, many women of color still couldn’t vote. Until 1977 women could be denied opening a credit card without a husband’s signature. 🤯 We’ve come a long way but there is still so much work to be done! Make sure you are registered to exercise this all-important hard-won right! Vote.